Visiting Captain Fibbur
by
Andrei Nekrasov
Publication date
1976
Translated by Fainna Glagoleva
Drawings by V. Bordilovsky
Captain Fibbur and I became friends when I was a
midshipman. We went to sea together many times. I later
helped the captain write his memoirs of his wonderful
cruise around the world on a sailboat. Many years have
passed since then, but we have remained friends through
thick and thin. Whenever I visit him, Captain Fibbur likes
to talk of times past, and he always says in parting: ‘‘Ah,
yes, young man. I’ve been through a lot and I’ve seen a lot
in my day, and there’s so much I could tell the world!”
I recently went to visit the old captain again. When he
opened the door he said in a mysterious voice, “I have a
surprise for you today, my friend.”
“What is it?”
“Wait and see.” He placed an envelope of slides on the
table. The envelope was yellow with age. “I took these
during that famous trip. Remember the Umph? I put these
slides away and then forgot all about them till I came upon
them this morning.”
We turned off the light and spent the evening looking
at slides.
“That’s me,” captain Fibbur said as he
turned on the projector. “I was in my prime
then. Not more than fifty. Just a boy,
really. Ah, how time flies.
“That’s our faithful Umph. I can’t
remember who took the picture or where it
was taken, but it came out fine. There’s
Lum, my first mate. He’s the one on the
left in the striped jersey. And Bux, an
able-bodied seaman. You can see him
resting on a crate. You can even see his
beard and hat. That’s me at the helm.
“You'll like this one. Don’t you know
who that is? It’s you! That was the first
time you came to see me. It’s a candid shot.
You didn’t even know I was taking the
picture. You might say I knew we'd
become friends.
“Here’s another first meeting. That’s
the first time I saw my ship. It was really a
tub when I took over, but I turned her into a
beauty. Too bad the carpenters used some
fresh planks, but Ill tell you about that
later.
“That’s Lum, my first mate again. A
very fine fellow. He’s seven feet tall and as
strong as an ox, and he’s got a voice like a
foghorn. They don’t come any better. But
you know him.
“Remember I said the carpenters used
fresh planks? Well, while the ship was in
dry-dock, the new wood sprang roots. They
had to use a tug to get us loose. That’s when
we lost the first three letters of the name, so
the Triumph became the ... Umph. Still and
all, I made the Umpha famous sailing ship,
as you Know.
“This is Lum and me in Norway. We
sailed up a fjord, left the ship and made a
campfire on the beach. That’s when the
forest nearby caught fire. Soon the fire was
closing in on us. We wanted to run, but
where could we go? The only place was up,
up to the top of the mountain. When we got
there we saw it was crowded with squirrels.
They were all trying to escape from the fire.
“T looked down. There was our ship.
You can see it between the cliffs. The
squirrels spotted it, too, and they dived
down in droves, right onto the deck. Then I
decided to jump. ‘Down after the squirrels,
Mate, full steam ahead!’ I shouted.
“Lum took a step towards the edge and
then turned and said: ‘I’d rather burn than
jump.’ I had to hand him my binoculars, to
make the ship seem closer. He jumped and
I followed. I’ve been around in my life and
didn’t need any help.
“That is how our voyage began. We
sailed around Europe to Africa. After we
took on supplies of ostrich eggs, elephant
trunks, dates and breadfruit we sailed
across the Red Sea. A terrible storm blew
up, and the heat was awful. Poor Bux got
seasick.
“T could hear him moaning: ‘A crocodile
... and another one ... and another croco-
dile.’ I decided he was coming down with
some strange tropical fever, but when I
struck a match I saw the deck was crawling
with crocodiles. They’d slipped us a load of
crocodile eggs instead of ostrich eggs, and
they’d all hatched in the heat.
“This is the three of us in the Antarctic.
We passed right by a sick whale. The poor
thing had a bad head cold and could hardly
breathe. I ground up some aspirin, put it on
a shovel and tossed it into its nostril. I
thought I was helping it, but it only made
the whale sneeze.
“That sneeze sent us sailing through the
clouds. I thought it was surely the end, but
we landed safely. Now Bux and I were
afone in the middle of the ocean, since we
had lost sight of the ship and Lum. There
were only two boards to keep us afloat.
“When we awoke the next day we
sighted land. It was Hawaii. The surf there
is wonderful. Everybody goes surfing in
Hawaii, so Bux and I stood up on our
boards and sailed right onto the beach.
“We found a newspaper. It had an
article about the Umph being shipwrecked
near Brazil. We immediately decided to fly
there. I had some money in my cap, but
only enough for two plane tickets. How-
ever, we needed some clothes. We saw a
cheap raincoat in a shop, but it was too
big.
“Bux had a good idea. He said, ‘Let’s
take it anyway. Then we can both fly on
one ticket. Bend over.’ He stood up on my
shoulders and put on the raincoat.
“Imagine, we got away with it. The
stewardess thought we looked funny, but
didn’t stop us. We got to our seat and were
soon off. Though Bux was having a nice
time, looking out of the window, I wasn’t
enjoying the trip very much.
“After a while I got out my pipe and lit
it. Suddenly I heard someone scream:
‘Help! Fire!’ I realised what was wrong, but
it was too late. Just then the pilot pulled a
lever and the cockpit broke away from the
rest of the plane. We were coming down on
a parachute, right over the Amazon.
“Did you ever go swimming in the
Amazon? Well, don’t. You haven’t missed
anything. There are clouds of mosquitoes
there and all sorts of horrible creatures in
the water. Things are still worse on the
bank. It was hard going, getting out of
there. Still, we were determined to find
Lum and we did. Imagine! It was a grand
reunion.
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